One Month Home

It is hard to believe we have been home a whole month. So much has changed in a matter of weeks and it's difficult to even begin to express all of the emotions and experiences that have been a part of our reality lately. In the coming days I hope to begin writing about our time in India, but for now I thought you all might want an update on our new normal.

So what has life been like since coming home? Honestly, Hadassah has done amazingly well. She is such a trooper and has dealt seamlessly with all of the changes she has experienced in such a short amount of time. She is curious, vocal and has an infectious laugh. Haddie is very much a mama's girl, which definitely takes some adjusting.

This...

 is what happens when I can't hold her all the time.

I am still sorting out how to get things done since she likes to be in my arms more often then not. While we were in India it took her a while to warm up to Jon but since we have arrived home she goes to daddy quite often and enjoys his attention.

She likes wearing his hats and playing hide and go seek, and most recently duck, duck, goose with her brother. We haven't quite figured out logistically how that last game works with only two kids but...they have fun! ;-)

She loves having her hair brushed and wearing bows.

Did I mentioned that she is a ham?

Like her brother...

We have tons of awesome pictures but our pictures don't always tell the whole story. Life when we first got home was hard...we still have quite a few hard days. Aiden struggled a lot in the beginning, which is understandable since it has been him, mom and dad for four and a half years now. It's not like we brought home a newborn that just laid around but we brought home a toddler who quickly got into his stuff and demanded mom and dad's attention. The first week home was difficult and full of trial and error as our family tried to figure out how to make things work. What is our routine like? How do we divide attention between two children with very different needs and backgrounds? How do I make time to spend with the Lord? How do Jon and I still make time for each other? It has been a balancing act and one I still haven't quite figured out but we are taking it one day at a time. It's exhausting and overwhelming but a journey I would most certainly take again.

I was sharing with a friend something that caught my attention during my time quiet time. I was reading through the Gospel of Mark and was struck by the demands put on Christ during his earthy ministry. Everywhere he went he was followed by throngs of people requesting healing, demanding miracles and longing to be fed, not just physically but spiritually as well. He was pressed on every side, pouring himself out daily because of his mercy and love towards his people. How often do I feel drained and poured out for my little ones? Daily? Looking at the selflessness of Christ has had a huge impact on me during my rough days. This work that is being done, parenting two children and one with a very complex background is redeeming work. As I feed, clothe, clean up messes, play and interact with my children I am attempting to show them a little glimpse of my Savior. Is my attempt a feeble one? Of course it is and I mess up more than I succeed but I'm learning in a small way the depth of love and grace I was shown on the cross. Daily I am learning more about the sweet love that Jesus poured out to me in my neediness and sin and I am blown away...humbled. It helps me take on a new day with hope even though the day before was awful. I am being refined and hopefully my children are seeing Jesus in the mess.

We are walking a road of redemption and it's awesome, hard and exhausting but it's what we are called to do and we are beyond blessed. Today I'm praising the Lord that we don't walk this messy road alone but that our Savior has already prepared the way.

Travel Dates and a BIG Prayer Request

I can't believe I am saying this but we got a call on Monday and learned that the orphanage finally has our daughter's passport which means we now have tentative travel dates!! We are thrilled! Our agency will have our definitive travel dates by the end of the week but right now we are looking to leave for India around January 24th, which just so happens to be a year to the day that we received our daughter's referral. Once we have firm travel dates we will be sure to keep family and friends posted.

Along with that amazing news we also have a very important and time sensitive prayer request. Jon's visa still has not been issued. We have waited since August and have been delayed with hardly any answers. Now we are at a critical stage. Jon cannot come with me to India without his passport and visa and in a mater of days we will need to book plane tickets. We desperately need your prayers for the Lord to move mountains. We have been unable to reach our contact concerning Jon's visa for over a week and a half and the lack of answers has been maddening. This situation has been heavy on Jon's heart since he longs so deeply to travel with me to meet our daughter. We covet your prayers and ask for you to intercede for us in the coming days. I personally have set aside time daily to pray over this matter and if you want to join me at 10am daily we can storm the gates together asking the Father to move mightily. I hope to have an update by the end of the week so until then please join us in prayer! We are so close guys!!!

Christmas Hope

Christmas is a week away, which is hard to believe. With Christmas fast approaching I have had to come to terms with the fact that we will not have Hadassah in our arms Christmas morning. It has been a frustrating couple of months. Lots of waiting with no answers and no timeframe. I have run the gamete of emotions but right now the pervading feeling is one of apathy. I'm just tired...of waiting...of hoping. I'm exhausted just wanting so deeply to hold our daughter.

We still do not have Haddie's passport (been waiting since October) nor do we have Jon's visa (waiting since August) and there has been no time frame given for when movement will happen. We know our pre-adoption journey is coming to a close but the wait is excruciating. I hate knowing that my daughter will spend one more Christmas in an orphanage...without her family. I had prayed and hoped that she would be celebrating Jesus in our arms but now have to surrender my own plans and desires to the Lord.

As I have wrestled with the frustration and disappointment of missing my daughter the Lord has been so gracious to remind me of a beautiful truth we celebrate this season. We do not worship some distant God, far removed and unconcerned with our lives. We worship and serve a God who chose to become man. Emmanuel, God with us.

The perfect God chose to take on flesh and dwell among us. Jesus met us in our selfishness and hopelessness. He took the form of a servant. Jesus speaks into our brokenness with forgiveness of sin and a promise that one day all things will be made new. He breathes peace into our pain and sorrow with the reminder that He is near. It's because of God's great love that I have comfort and peace this season even though my sweet daughter is spending this Christmas away from her family. My God, Emmanuel is with her. He is her comfort when my arms ache to comfort her. Pray with me in our wait that He would whisper hope into our sweet daughter's soul. As we wait and anticipate our daughter's homecoming I am reminded that so many others are waiting too. There are people all around me who need to hear the hope of Christmas. They need to hear that there is a God who has come near to save us from our sin. He came into our muck and mire to lift us out of it and to breath into us new life, new hope and a new purpose. I am choosing to celebrate the hope of Christmas in our wait and am in my own brokenness seeking to share the hope that I have found. Hope has come and today I am clinging to that!

She is Ours!

It's still so hard to believe...Hadassah has been legally declared our daughter by the high court in India. It has been a long time coming.

Haddie was around 18 months in this picture.

She is officially ours and we cannot wait until we finally get her home. There is one step standing between us and traveling to pick her up. Now that the orphanage has the written orders from the judge they will then apply for her passport. We were told that the orphanage will apply for her passport next week however we have not been given any time-frame for how long it will take for her passport to be issued. Our agency thinks we could travel in December but there is a chance that we won't travel until next year depending on how quickly her paperwork gets filed and how long the passport office takes.

Guys, we are so close! Please continue to pray for us and her during this last wait. There is much that needs to be done before we travel and of course things will get crazy hectic when we get the travel phone call. Pray that our joy and hope would be set on the Lord in this wait. Some days the wait hangs over my head distracting me from the truth.God has provided and our sweet girl IS coming home. It's just a matter of time. Praise God for ALL that He has done.

Here are a few more pictures, they are quite a bit older though. These were the first glimpses of our daughter that we received back in January. I cannot wait to get my hands on this cutie!

Prayer Requests:
- Jon's visa has still not been issued. We have been waiting over three months now. Pray that his visa will come in time for travel.
- We deeply desire to travel before Christmas. Pray that everything falls into place so that we can spend Christmas together as a family of 4!

Court News

Well friends I have seriously slacked on blogging lately. There just hasn't been much to report and honestly this had been the hardest period of waiting for us since the journey began. I don't know if things hurt more because we are so close or because news is few and far between but we continue to pray and believe that one day soon we will be able to hold our daughter.

Back in August not long after receiving NOC we were able to compile a photo book to send to the orphanage.

We had a custom board book made just for her. A few weeks ago we got verification that the orphanage did indeed get the book and we assume that she has seen our pictures. My mind wonders to our daughter and I am curious if she even grasps the enormity of what is taking place. Did she smile when she saw our pictures? Did she giggle at her brother's ridiculous faces? It's hard when we have seen other adopting families receive updated pictures of their children with smiling faces holding their photo books. The most recent picture we have seen was after waiting 3 months to receive her referral in April and we assume that picture was taken back in January or February. What does she look like now? What is her personality like? Oh this mama's heart is often times overwhelmed with questions and an ache that becomes more intense every passing day.

So where are we now? Well we were told that our paperwork was submitted to the court system. Some detective work had been done by another adopting mama who introduced me to a website with court information. After checking the site for weeks on end one random morning I finally discovered our names and found out that we were due to have a second court hearing. That second hearing took place Saturday August 23rd. There has been no update since then which is not unusual at all. From what we have gathered it will most likely take 5-6 hearings before we receive approval from the judge. We may not hear any more news until we pass court which is not expected until the end of September so yet again we are waiting. This wait although hard continues to solidify the truth we have felt in our hearts since we first saw a picture of our dark eyed, crazy haired beautiful little girl...

Moving Right Along

Well...

We now have NOC!!

We were granted NOC June 30th and got a call from our agency today to tell us the terrific news. The timeline we were initially told continues to be blown out of the water and I am so thrilled. The next step in our process is court and after the judge approves our adoption we will wait for our daughter's passport to be issued. Once the orphanage has her passport in hand we will book our flights!! As of right now it looks very plausible that we will travel before the end of the year if not sooner.

The biggest advantage about getting NOC is that we can now send a photo book to our daughter. I'm not sure if she has been told about us yet but now she will actually get to see pictures of her family. I was not expecting to receive NOC this quick so I need to get her photo book finished and sent to our agency.

This is what the remainder of our process looks like:
Court: 2 months
Written Approval from the judge: Days or weeks
Passport: 2-4 weeks
Travel: 2 weeks from physical passport being sent to the orphanage

Once again this timeline is not concrete. There is a good chance we could have to wait longer at any one of these steps. I am longing to have our daughter home before Christmas so please pray for a quick review of our case. We will continue to let our friends and family know of any progress. I can't wait to finally show you our daughter's picture.

Big Step!

We have ARC!!!
 

Yes, I can hardly believe it myself. Our official paperwork was sent to India in early April and we just heard today that we received state approval. From everything we had been told this step would take the longest just because there was no information as to how often the state committees met. Once we were told this news our agency said that this is one of the quickest turnarounds they have seen for state approvals. Woohoo!! Praise the Lord. I'm still in shock.

 

Back in the beginning of June we learned that we were given article 5 so now we are officially waiting on NOC, which is basically federal approval for our family to adopt the specific child we have been matched with. The wait time for NOC could be as short as a couple of weeks or it could be months. There really is no telling. After NOC we wait for court, then the orphanage will apply for our child's passport and once that happens we will finally travel. Right now I am just rejoicing at this great provision and answer to prayer. We are one HUGE step closer to bringing our daughter home. Thank you for the prayers. Keep them coming!!

 

(I may or may not have looked like this after I got off the phone with our agency. I have been on cloud nine all day!)